One Saturday afternoon I found myself staring at my naked reflection in the mirror before I jumped in the shower, which led me to some very interesting thoughts. This came after the boring thoughts of ‘ooh I like this about my body. Must get a haircut. Boy I need to tone up. Blah blah blah.’… You know that destructive judgmental thought cycle most females, and I’m sure many men go through.
So the first interesting thought I had was this…
There was a time a few thousand years ago, when mirrors, or even basic reflective surfaces weren’t there for our own vanity. Shock horror! What did we do? How did we doll ourselves up?
Well, I guess our self expression through clothing and accessories – be it probably a bear skin jacket and a bone tied to some dried grass back in those times – was far more practical, but also not such major part of day to day life.
Not having that ever so handy mirror, you couldn’t really just go look at yourself and judge so harshly. This was probably not such a bad thing. Of course I realize, there’s a couple of other places you could go to, to check yourself out.
There’s a few movies I remember where you would have the girl go to the pool of water to look at her reflection, even Simba did in the Lion King! Not only did you draw on water to live, to cleanse yourself, it was a reflection of you. Water has always been that symbol of the emotions. When you look at yourself in the pool of water, it’s not still like a mirror. It’s constantly moving, even when it is still. Just like yourself, your emotions, everything about you is constantly changing, and the water reflects that change, as much as you do. You reflect the water, and the water reflects you.
The other place that you can see your self is in someone else’s eyes. It’s a romanticized concept staring into someone’s eyes, and is said to be the window to the soul. But when you think about the power of them, how could it not be? Not only is it one of our most poignant observation tools, it is also the one place that you can truly see yourself, in another, both literally and metaphorically.
It’s certainly almost a lost art making eye contact with someone. How often do we drift on in distraction whilst in conversation? Being engaged in eye contact, you really do have a deeper connection. Partially I think, because you are allowing the truth of yourself to really come out. You can’t hide from yourself when someone is directly reflecting you, and your own truth.
There’s that age-old adage that people are a reflection of you, and I think this is a very true fact. There’s nothing more compelling, and not too many moments more magical or intense when you can be lost in someone’s eyes. The beauty is, you’re allowing yourself to be immersed in the moment. Most importantly, you’re allowing yourself to be immersed in yourself, and also in another.
It’s at this point you definitely wouldn’t be thinking, ‘does my butt look big in this?’ Obviously! However because we spend so much time worrying about the reflection in a mirror, we make judgments, rather than allowing one to perceive what it is to be your true self.
So next time you go to judge yourself by your reflection, remind yourself that the mirror is only glass – it really is transparent. Try seeing yourself in the eyes of another. Be like the water and try immersing yourself in the pool of emotional connection. You’ll probably realize just how beautiful you really are and also once you let go of appearances, you will see just how deep your connection to life and love can go.